1. “I Pull Out Before I Shoot Out’: Oshey, Lord Withdrawal! Didn’t they tell you that your pre-cum has enough sperm from your last self-service session to father a child? Oh okay, you pee in- between sessions. Nice move. But you can’t honestly tell me that there weren’t a few slip-ups in all your pull out encounters. You and I know that the sweetest part is when you offload all your goods in the right warehouse. So stop applauding yourself for staining the sheets. And just a little reminder, someone in the bible days died because of this type of thing.
2. ‘I Tear Open The Condom Package With My Teeth’: It’s good to get the mouth, and sometimes even the teeth involved during S3x but please, use your fingers to tear open the condom package. Why? To avoid poking a hole into the condom, stupid. The only hole you should be poking should be… never mind. The wise ones understand what I’m talking about.